The Heart-Searcher
Rosh Hashanah 5783 - What do you call God?
Hineni - Rabbi Josh Warshawsky Featuring the Chaverai Nevarech Band
What do you call God? Just like our dear friends, our children, our parents and grandparents, we have special names we call God at different times. Sometimes they are familial or connection names, like Eloheinu v’Elohei Avoteinu, our God and God of our ancestors, or Elohei Avraham v’Sarah, God of Abraham and Sarah. But most often they are relational or aspirational names - names that relate to what we are doing or what we hope or imagine or pray God will do in any particular situation, like Rofeh Cholim, healer of the sick, or names about the kind of relationship we hope (or need) to have with the One-to-Whom-We-Direct-Our-Prayers.
On the High Holidays we get a little aggressive, discombobulated, and incoherent with our God-naming throughout the holidays. We move so quickly from Avinu (parent) to Malkeinu (ruler). We fluctuate between Av Harachamim (Merciful Parent) and Hamelech Hamishpat (The Just Ruler). But if we look closely throughout the machzor, the clear themes start to emerge:
Hayode’ah Yetzer - The Knower of All Creatures
Hakatzar b’Za’am - The One Who Shortens Their Temper and Holds Back Anger
Hapotei’ach Sha’ar L’Dofkei BiTeshuvah- The One Who Opens the Gate for Those Who Knock in Repentence (what a great one!)
El Rachum V’Chanun - Merciful and Compassionate One
Ehyeh Asher Ehyeh - The One Who Is.
The only reason we showed up today in the first place is because we care. We care about this relationship. We care about who we are and how we walk in the world.
We call out in relationship. And the idea is that when we come before the court in judgment, how hopeful would we feel to look up and see that we know the judge! And not only do we know the judge, we feel so close and connected to them. Yes, the judge may know us better than we know ourselves, but at the same time they understand that the only reason we showed up today in the first place is because we care. We care about this relationship. We care about who we are and how we walk in the world. We care about accepting our mistakes and working to correct them.
And so when I as the prayer leader call out to God with the Hineni prayer, I want to make sure I am using relational names I am feeling and/or am hoping to feel in that moment. So I added my own to this text, from other places in the High Holiday liturgy:
Adon Hamechilah - Master of Forgiveness
Bochein Levavot - Heart-Searcher
Shome’a Tefilah - Prayer-Listener
Goleh Amukot - Revealer of Deep Secrets
As we approach Rosh Hashanah, what would it look like to truly be present? What do we hope to feel? With Whom do we hope to connect? What name will we call out in the moment?
Wishing all of you a Shanah Tovah, and hope to see and sing with you in 5784!
Josh
